It was late afternoon, the
sun was low and our stomachs spotted an American diner beckoning to us in the
township of Front Royal, Virginia. We were puzzled by the town’s name and asked
the waitress during dinner how it came to be so called. She replied: “I
graduated high school six years ago and I have forgot all that stuff, but I
know there's a lot of history in these parts.”
We
later discovered that during the Civil War, troops used to parade in front of a
large ‘Royal Oak’ tree with the command: "Front! Royal!"
On
another occasion, we called into the Amish township of
Intercourse, Pennsylvania, but thought it best not to ask the waitress how
that town got its name.
It was
autumn 2012; what better time to drive along the colourful back-roads of North
Eastern USA! The countryside was ablaze with brilliant colours of birch and maple
trees. Restaurants and diners were decked out with quirky
and ghoulish Halloween themes, each serving delicious pumpkin or hot
cinnamon apple pies.
At the
small historic town of Winchester, Virginia, with its beautifully
maintained white clapboard stores, and snow-white church, we
stopped to stretch our legs. And like a couple of kids, we scuffed our
way along the cobbled Main Street through large damp drifts of colourful autumn
leaves.
We found a ‘Ma and Pa’ diner serving ‘Bavarian cream
donuts’ and steaming mugs of coffee; it was just what we needed
before heading off in our search for the famous autumn colours of New
England.
The
once elegant city of Troy, New York, sits upon the banks of the Hudson
River. It’s renowned for two things, which I shall tell you about, thus saving
you the time of having to drive there.
First
of all, it has scores of unmarked one-way streets and numerous large
signs pointing to a 'Visitors Centre' that doesn’t exist. It was only on our
third trip around the same block that we stopped and were informed that a
sturdy trestle table with leaflets was usually set up on days when visitors
were expected - unless it was raining. The day we arrived, it was raining and I
doubt we were expected.
Second
of all, during the American Revolution, a butcher by the name of Sam
Wilson built up a nice business as a government supplier of meat to
the American Army. He stamped the letters ‘U.S.’ on all his barrels of meat to
indicate United States, before the states were even united. People thought it meant
‘Uncle Sam'. The term stuck and passed into common usage to mean the
government. Not a lot of people know that, but then again I expect you are glad
we saved you the journey.
We also
stopped briefly at the hamlet of Bennington to view an enormous obelisk, which
commemorates the day in August 1777 when the revolutionaries fought off the
British who were trying to steal their cache of food. The locals, on hearing
our British accents, took great joy joshing with us about the day they ‘kicked
our butts’. I think the irony of their remark was lost on them, considering
they were third and fourth generation Italian, German and Swedish immigrants.
Anyway, I rebutted by pointed out that hanging onto their lunch box was hardly
justification to build a 306-foot granite obelisk, and that any further
insolence from them would be reported to the Queen when we returned from our
inspection of the colonies. We thought it best to leave before an international
incident occurred.
On our
return journey to Virginia we called into Berkeley Springs where we had
been told an 'Apple Butter Festival' was in progress. This tiny spa town
lay in a damp hollow in the back hills of West Virginia and had once been
owned by Lord Fairfax. Its two streets overflowed with craft stalls, folk
music and people warming themselves around open fires upon which cauldrons
of Apple Butter simmered.
I am
not sure whether it was the cold or the coffee that prompted my desperate need
for a toilet. Mercifully, I spotted a row of portaloos leading off the main
street and with relief pulled open one of the doors. I had one foot
inside when I realised I was face to face with a grossly over-weight,
half-naked woman, whose body was truly wedged within the walls of the
thunder-box. Fortunately for me, her
modesty was well covered by the multitudinous folds of a cascading ‘Michelin’ stomach.
Boy!
Was I surprised to see her! But not half as surprised as she was to see
me! We were both speechless. The whole street seemed to be watching.
Should I wait until the ‘fat lady sings’? Or leave before she found her voice
and let rip with a rant at me?
I
decided to forgo the formalities of an introduction and raised my cap
as I closed the door. Did I do the right thing? I wonder what ‘Miss
Manners’ would have advised? What would you have done? Answers on a postcard
please.
Click here to read about another confrontation - this time with the Gander Family.
Click here to read about another confrontation - this time with the Gander Family.
Well now, just where to begin with this one. I'm truly pleased that your gentlemanly streak emerged (doffing the cap as one should)in meeting the lady although I thought you'd have made a comment appropriate to the occasion. This is where one's imagination can run riot. I had the same experience on a train from Brokenhurst to London, the door being unlatched. The lady's shriek and body language seemed to indicate otherwise. I was so surprised I even forgo to apologise or even blush with embarrassment.
ReplyDeleteRoy, at the risk of repeating myself I must write that your yarns are quite motivational in nature in that they provide an insight into places not found elsewhere. I imagine the unmarked streets of Troy together with places that don't exist can be likened to Venice. I was not the only one to carefully follow directions and signs in that city only to find myself in a cul-de-sac. No doubt you acquitted yourself well in representing the crown in the colony of Bennington. The dammed cheek of the people! You know from previous times here that that Australians are always far more respectful of those from the "mother country".
I've not heard of apple butter before and don't really know if it's a butter to spread (as in peanut butter) or a form of toffee. We'll talk further on that.
Keep up the great work, particularly the humorous anecdotes.